He believed in me fully

He believed in me fully
It wasn’t that I couldn’t do it
It was that I was not ready to do it
It wasn’t that I wasn’t good enough
It was that it was wrong for me

He followed me when I left him behind
He acknowledged me when I needed validation
I was never alone
Because he would talk to me regardless of the time
He needed me
The way I need him

When I had to leave he supported me
He never said it was too little
He never said it was too grand
My dreams were an extension of his
I COULD BE ANYTHING I WANTED TO BE
In his eyes, I was Boudecia
Cleopatra and Oshun all in one

I will miss him
I always thought I would be there when he left
But I wasn’t
I was not there when he needed me the most
I lost our talk to my selfishness
I did not forget
But did not take the time to remember

I did not find out for 8 months
8 months of postponed phone calls
8 months of email sent and returned
8 months of searches I did not put my heart in
8 months of not going back

I miss my friend
I miss him so much
He thought I could do it all
I could travel the world
Be the greatest actress that ever lived
Write the book that will redefine a generation
Make documentaries that will reveal all
Run for president and win
Make my mark in a world with so many

I was never less to him
I was more
I was loved
I was wanted
I was queen
I was
I was
I was
I was
I was
I was
I was

Oh why, why did you not wait for me
Why did you not let me know
Why did you leave me

Oh I’ll miss you
With my every breath
I miss you
My tears are not really of sadness
They just tears to help me remember
All that you meant to me
And all that I meant to you

We Found Paradise
And made it into a tourist documentary

I will go back
I will go to all the places I didn’t go then
I will record it
I will air it
I will try to be all you saw me to be
I WILL be all you saw me to be
I will never forget
My friend
Never

For Philip